is there a way to let the AI play as heroes but also keep the hero rules intact such as not letting the player constanly respawn as the unit?

I wasn't just whistling Dixie when I said you needed to put in "AI hero support." A quick search would have yielded (among other results):
http://www.gametoast.com/forums/viewtop ... =64&t=7088

It's a script written by archer01, just follow the instructions carefully and it's a snap to add.